silence

'blackness, blackness and silence'. it sometimes covers me and I am unable to speak, to say one word. it's usually misinterpreted exactly because of the lack of words that follows the sad curtain that covers my heart. it's days when I don't understand the world and the people that live in it- who talk to me or not. It's all getting so complicated.. too complicated to understand. And I wish I could be just a child again that had no concern and no knowledge of the world that is out there.

I do not want an answer, don't need it. Just getting those things out helps by forming them into sentences which define them. lock them in their cages. I will smile soon.

Award!!!

I received this wonderful blog award from The Wild Wolves! I have never gotten one so I'm really happy :D You're right, the gratitude grows while I'm writing this :) Now I have to write seven things about me.. Tricky, makes you think about the weird stuff about yourself.. So here goes!

1. I talk to plants. There, I said it. Once by accident I ripped off the blooming part of my orchid and I apologised to it for a week every time I passed it.. Everyone here is used to it by now, luckily.

2. I'm hyperactive in the morning, I have tons of ideas and do ten things at once, but in the evening I'm brain dead. You can askm me anything and I wouldn't know the answer. So if I don't have anything that has to be done at once I just read to give my head something to trail along until I fall asleep :) But don't thing that I' m not normal.. They all say that it's just too much work during the day that does this to me. I hope it's true!



3.lately I've been collecting dogs from happy meals in mcdonald's.. Childhood is something beautiful.. I have to get a big house to have room for all the stuffed animals that I refuse to give away. They're so cute!


4. I'm very proud that while being at the academy I can walk around with a ton of crayons in my purse and think it's a very big deal :)

5. Once some time has passed with my cute kitty being gone I'm starting to be nuts about small pets. I go to pet stores just to look at them, I talk to cats that I pass on my way to school. The best cure is a cat of course, Unfortunately I'm not the one to decide.. So I'm waiting..



6. The greatest sickness that I fear is something that will mutilate me that comes from my anemia.. So here, the fear that keeps me awake lately.. It's terrible having something lurking around the corner.. I hope it'll be ok soon...



7. I already found the love of my life, it's cool thinking- this is it! He's the one. Well, i'm a lucky girl I guess :)




To send some more happiness around I will pass this award to:

natsumi nishizumi
and
owl in the dark

problems problems

I bring to you my latest love- red red lipstick that follows me everywhere, that leaves red marks on coffee cups and lets me smile in that specific sort of way, that only dark lips can achieve.. Aside from that.. here are some pics I added to my deviantart page, and sent to a store in the hometown of my Precious. I can't wait till they write back.. i hope they'll want my jewellry.. I'm working on my internet account but banks here are stubborn in letting you walk out with nothing. So I keep on trying.

What do you think? :)

final preparations before barszcz begins selling

More and more cuties! I have been spending every moment of my free time thinking of new ideas to show you. The cuties are somehow a balance to the gloomy work I do for school, etching bones, burning them out in acid. I raise the gloom and weltschmerz in waves with music that makes my soul cry out. So to keep sane. The new teddy bears, muffins, ice cream cones and a bit of a halloweenish taste with two pairs of bony earrigs are coming up slowly. And I am happy to see your support and lovely comments. They mean so much to me..


This is my first ever order for money- a custom t-shirt with Peter Pan's best friend painted on it by hand.. I'm quite proud of it.




Even Gustav, my desk friend, is amazed by the amount of time I spend working :)

creatures!

Lately I've been a very busy girl, drowning in materials, beads and ribbons. I've been making cute jewellry, hoping to give some sparks to those who will want to buy these precious little things. But as the ideas came out of my head one by one these little furry friends came to life along with the earrings.. They remind me of magical lands and forest creatures that sang songs with young Bambi, the ones that brought a smile to me every time I saw them.. and they still do..



Whispering the words of songs they sit on my desk, remind me that there is a world far more beautiful than the grey and rainy one outside..



I wish for moonlight and sunbeams at once, for a dream that will bring rest and joy, for a sign that everyday isn't just a hint of what my life could be.


I want to live.

little treats

These are some of the little sweets that I made in hopes for selling them. Wish me luck! I hope you like them, I'm still not sure about my abilities in this area :)

projects for etchings and lino